'I lived the dream': Dude gets revenge on raging Karen demanding his assistance

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    Font - "I lived the dream."
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    Font - Posted by u/FewForce5165 I lived the dream XXL Readers of the Reddit! Long time lurker, first time liar....um, poster, yea, poster, that's right. Not sure if it fits here or in Petty Revenge. I've been reading stories for a long time and I, like many others, ponder about what I would do in that situation. Well, a few years ago, I read of a man at a landscaping store loading his truck with some product when a wild KAAAAARENNNN grabbed him causing him to drop and break what he was loading.
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    Font - Last month, I was at our local, very big, home improvement chain in our region of the country. There is a big indoors where you load your shopping cart and an even bigger open and covered outside area for the bulkier, dirtier, heavier items. They have a sample of each one near the service desk where they check stock and fill out a loading form of everything you want. You pay for your carted items as well as your yard items and they staple the loading sheet to your receipt. You then drive
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    Font - I was loading two dozen one-foot square, cheaply made colored cement, pavers into the back of my SUV. I had to pick through them as many were chipped or split and was day dreaming about how the project when our well known protagonist, the Karenus Krapolius, slithers in stage right and pulled on my sleeve causing a paver to tilt onto one I just loaded and chip the corner off.
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    Font - Like all the Karen Krapuponus's prior, I was dumbfounded as she was screeching the "yada, yada, pay attention, respect my authoratah, service me NOW" song of her people. She must have thought I could not possibly drive a Yukon so I must be a slow moving, lowly employee whose sole purpose is to kiss her Krapolius. While her off key caterwauling rose a couple of octaves, she thrust her loading slip quite forcefully into my chest demanding I hurry up and load her precious cargo of some other
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    Font - Learned well she did at the school of Karen as she promptly, on cue, spun around and started wailing into her phone at another one of her kind. My mind was in overdrive, "Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, I'm really going get to do it and dump a load into her Karen carriage". But just then I had an epiphany pop right into my brain. They just happen, I can't do anything about it. I got into my truck and drove off. She never looked back.
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    Font - I got to the exit gate and had to show the guard my loading slip to get out and for "my protection" they opened my truck and verified that my count wasn't accidently off by a hundred or so extra pavers. I was cleared by the keeper of the yard and drove out....... with Karen's loading slip and receipt in my pocket that security cameras would show her assaulting and battering me with as she GAVE it to me. Now without said royal document, no employee can nor will help her load anything nor c
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    Font - I pulled around and found an area through the fence where I could see her now dragging two actual employees around yelling and yacking, pacing and pointing, leering and looking for that lazy, no-good employee of myself who vanished like a f in the wind.
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    Font - I've had various issues to correct things like this. They have to go back in to the service desk and void out the original receipt that she didn't have which involved un-scanning everything from her cart and then rescanning it all back onto a new receipt and then making a new loading slip. Not a fast or enjoyable thing to go through, especially for a Karen with the patience of a Kraken. She could then, with her papers in order, again drive through the guard post and finally get a real emp
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    Font - As I was leaving, another epiphany piphed it's way into my head. I took her paperwork, put it into a shopping cart and buried it into the cart corral. Soon, some coraller of carts will find it and turn it into the manager who will immediately know that Karen lost it herself and not the ficticious employee who was the man who never returned and his fate is still unlearned.
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    Font - Joshy207_dcfc I thought you were going to say you drove around back, picked up her order, and took it home > Reply Share 161 FewForce5165 OP ●●● Well... that thought crossed my mind while watching her melt down as well as just taking and cashing in the rebate receipt. But too much of a chance of getting caught and they would be voiding the receipt anyways, so I probably couldn't get away with that. And I'm not that big of a dishonest person.
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    Font - The next day, I also thought that I could have instead, played along and loaded her SUV with all of the wrong SKUs or too many items which might result in her face down at the guard shack. 113 Reply Share
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    Font - Rotas_dw So, as Zaphod would say, 10/10 for style but minus several million for inconveniencing the staff there who had to then do extra work and deal with an enraged Karen. Next time, if such a time should exist, consider doing something to inconvenience the Karen which won't result in abuse of, or extra work for, the employees. 145 Reply Share
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    Font - TJamesV I probably would've just dropped her receipt on the floor right there and fiOd off lol Reply Share 13 Imaginary-Hornet-397 Preferably in a puddle. 3 Reply Share
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    Font - llorandosefue1 Big Haha from here, plus extra points for your Kingston Trio "The MTA" reference. ↑ 16 Reply Share FewForce5165 OP 12 ●●● Took me the longest time to name that tune and get the actual words that wee floating in my head. Reply Share

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